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You are here: Products Hermit Girl by E. M. Collyer

Hermit Girl by E. M. Collyer

Willow has always thought of herself as a raging extrovert stuck in an introvert’s body. Someone forever looking on from the side lines, never quite fitting in. But she’s forced from her comfortable little bubble when she receives a message from someone who couldn’t possibly contact her.
With great effort she assembles a gang of like-minded social outcasts, people that society has left behind, and sets out to uncover a dark secret from her past.

– 2019 American Fiction Awards Finalist

SKU: B07QHJKVRP Category: Contemporary Tags: E. M. Collyer, fiction, humor, romance
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About the author:

E.M. Collyer has always aspired to be a real life hermit, you know, one of those people who live out in the woods and have bugs in their hair. Sadly, an allergy to all types of foliage and a severe fear of bugs have made this dream impossible.
Hermit Girl is a debut novel which placed as a finalist in the 2019 American Fiction Awards

Here is a short sample from the book:

So I’m not one for complaining – okay I am, most of the time, but I’m not complaining right now, so bear with me – we really dropped the ball on this whole life thing. We did. All of us. By most estimations civilization has been going strong in some form or another for about six thousand years, but in all that time, did we find a cure for the most common of all human problems?
No, we did not.
In fact, we’ve collectively produced millions of books and movies about love and relationships, but is there even one well-researched tome on how best to un-fall in love? On how to instantly and effectively get over someone?
No, there is not.
The only thing out there is some lame advice on keeping your distance and giving it time. And maybe burning some photos while eating a particular kind of willow bark – and I’m not even sure about that one, I might’ve made it up.

But I’m going to back it up here a moment, Alice, because that’s not really where I wanted to start. So many things have changed since you left, I’m so different from the girl you knew back when we were little, that I often wonder if you’d even recognize me now, and if you’d still want to know me.
So maybe I should start with the familiar. The few things that haven’t changed. I still can’t communicate with people. On any level. I still feel like everyone else shares this hidden, common language. This secret code that explains why they all get along so easily while I feel like an alien standing on the sidelines – someone who looks human enough, but who never quite fits in. And I’m still terribly, debilitatingly shy. That continues to be the proverbial wheel clamp on my almost non-existent social life. Yup, I’m still a raging extrovert stuck in an introvert’s body!
Sometimes I think I’d rather die and be buried in a shallow, unmarked grave than talk to new people.
But, as I said, there are some things that have changed, and the biggest is definitely the fact that I had to deal with a breakup.
Yes, you heard right, Alice: your Willow had to deal with a breakup!
I know you won’t believe me, so let me explain how I got into this mess in the first place…

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