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About the author:
Fifteen SBR Media authors present to you: A Love for Romance.
What inspired you to write your book?
When we see two people in love we often find ourselves wondering how they got to that point and I think that’s what this anthology is all about. Reading about the way couples, young and old, navigate their way through life and live through the journey of them finding someone they connect with on another level gives a reader hope that the same could happen for them or give a reader a new way to jumpstart their current romantic situations.
Here is a short sample from the book:
By: Kahlen Aymes
Six years since I left her. Six fucking years.
It seemed like I had no choice at the time; like it was the start of a dream, not the beginning of a nightmare.
The offer from the English Arsenal Football Club was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity and I couldn’t pass it up, no matter how much it ripped me apart to leave Teagan behind, but our plan was for her to finish college then come over there, too. It never happened.
It got all fucked up somehow. Royally fucked up. I spent years trying to figure out why it happened and I was determined to forget about her. I threw myself into the game, booze and numerous women; nothing helped but a lot of time. If I were honest, the pain never really went away and I felt the loss every goddamned day. What made it worse was that I knew I never should have left. It was Teagan, and not soccer, who was my once-in-a-lifetime everything, but I thought we were madly in love and I completely trusted that… I completely trusted her. We knew it would be a difficult couple of years, but I had no reason to doubt that things wouldn’t go as planned. I thought we were invincible, yet, not six months after I left she married my best friend behind my back.
Some best friend. Anger cut through me like a red-hot knife and settled in to sear my gut and tighten my chest. There was no one I hated more.
My heart ached whenever I allowed myself to think about it. She tried to explain, but I didn’t want to hear the words. I felt betrayed; too devastated to find the will to function, let alone listen. Looking at her would have sliced me open to bleed out right in front of her, and after a betrayal like that, I’d be damned if I’d let her see me suffer.
Jensen tried to talk to me, too, but I was afraid if I saw him, one of us would die. What did it fucking matter anyway? No reason could make it better, more believable, or easier to accept. I’d closed down, focused on the team, and stopped corresponding with either of them. It was the only way to breathe. My eyes burned and my throat tightened. After all this time, it was still killing me…so often, I ached to call her, my soul crying out for hers, my mind railing that it was all a dream and if I could only hear that sweet voice, my reality would be righted. Over time, I realized keeping as busy as possible was the only thing to keep the memories from eating me alive.
The Arsenal and its world class program wasn’t worth it. A huge career and being one of the top ten soccer players in the world meant nothing. Nothing was worth losing Teagan, but I’d made a life for myself, despite her. Somehow, I moved on. I breathed in and out. I waited, prayed for, and crawled toward the day when it wouldn’t hurt. I was still crawling on the inside, but I’d learned how to camouflage it so no one could see it anymore, but part of me was dead.
My parents and siblings knew not to mention her after the first few attempts. The rage and drinking binges that resulted had finally kept them quiet. Even Kevin stopped badgering me.
“Just leave it alone, Kev! I can’t fucking stand thinking about what she’s doing with Jensen. Nothing will justify it! If Jensen was bleeding out in the street, the reason still wouldn’t be good enough for her to be with him. It makes me sick!”
I’d flung my mother’s Ming vase at my brother and it barely missed his head; shattering in a million pieces against the wall behind him. He stood there stunned for a split second as my chest heaved and his image blurred behind a haze of fury and tears. Then, he rushed at me, tackling me to the ground. He beat the shit out of me, leaving me broken and crying her name, asking God why she wasn’t mine, begging for relief that never came, wishing I could die right there because I couldn’t see any other way to end the horrible pain. I didn’t know if I was hitting at Kevin or Teagan’s memory, but afterward, he dropped to his knees and held on to me as I fell apart. The whole family looked on in stunned shock, all of them powerless to help me. It was Christmas break my freshman year and I’d gotten drunk off my ass to try to forget. Everyone left me alone ever since.