satire

Showing all 10 results

  • The Kinky Prince: The Complete Series by Wilde Mann

    0 out of 5

    Have you met Prince Stefan yet? He’s the most photographed member of the Royal Family, and the randiest. His mother the Queen bought him a membership in a sex club in London to keep his antics out of their own country.

    Follow his adventures through the five books included in this volume, Watch him cavort with actresses, a princess, and his own secretary, or as he calls her, his sexetary and finally decide to get married…

    It’s a hot, steamy time when you follow Stefan’s sexcapades, guaranteed to make your panties damp and leaving you longing for a night with him!

    If you like reading about slightly wicked Alpha men as they satisfy their carnal urges, you’re going to love Wilde Mann’s series, The Kinky Prince.

    Get it now, and get off on his adventures as he enjoys some very kinky times!

  • What to Kill For by Tomi Farrell

    0 out of 5

    A single woman whose biological clock is ticking hunts for a husband in the “Land of Mr. Wrongs” also known as Los Angeles. “Fortunately,” she gets kidnapped by a Mexican mobster.

    *****
    Shannon is just another single woman in Los Angeles who is desperate to find “The One.” She is a pretty, decently-educated Episcopalian princess, and—it appears—there is absolutely nothing wrong with her. What appears to be wrong is that her Prince Charming is ten years overdue, and more than fashionably late in making his appearance.

    Meanwhile, Shannon gets kidnapped by a Mexican mobster from one of the most notorious crime syndicates in Mexico. It is payback for her boss’s corruption and wrongdoing in secret, criminal transactions. Shannon’s hope for her release is slim since she knows her boss couldn’t care less about her life. She must escape on her own and return to her everyday agenda of searching for her future husband. She has to hurry, too, because she’s running out of time!

  • Bitten: A Practical Guide to Dating a Vampire by Mary Kipps

    0 out of 5

    How do you survive a fatal attraction when the date of your dreams is a bloodsucker? From where to meet one to living past a breakup, this guide offers helpful tips for navigating a relationship with one of the true undead: weeding out the wannabes, first date dos and don’ts, post-bite etiquette, savvy gifts, meeting his friends, introducing him to your family, how to tell if your vampire may be cheating on you, and more.

  • A Sucker for Heels by Mary Kipps

    0 out of 5

    As a Moravian vampire forced to attack in the nude, Victor frequently finds his intentions misperceived and his attempts to acquire nourishment bloodless. But his plight is no longer a blank page. With the eBook release of his misadventures in America – 27 works of flash fiction, though from Victor’s point of view there is little fiction involved and any flashing was not intentional – he has acquired certain repute. Now, author Mary Kipps reveals what happens to him next in this sequel of witty vignettes. Victor does not want the only recording of his existence to be All in Vein.

  • Fighting Mad by Kathy Bryson

    0 out of 5

    Laid off from her job at the bank, Carla turns to her friends for support only to find they’re more concerned about their jobs. The one person she can count on is local bartender Murphy, but what kind of example is that to set for her daughters? Having learned the hard way, Carla’s not depending on any man, even if he is cute, charming, very kind, and some kind of leprechaun?

    Murphy is used to sneers. Clurichauns are the redheaded stepchildren of the leprechaun world and then there are the late-night throw-downs at his bar. What he wants, however, is to protect the dainty little mom who ogles him when she thinks no one’s looking. He knows she’s fighting overwhelming odds, but she’ll need more than bravery when the conflict between the King and Queen of the Fairies becomes outright civil war!

  • Taken by the Tetris Blocks by Leonard Delaney

    0 out of 5

    When blocks started falling from the sky, Christie Aackerlund welcomed the excitement. Now she’s having a bad day at work, and craving some fun and games. Luckily, she runs into some Russian blocks that are looking to score. Soon, she’ll be the one falling … in lust.

    Taken by the Tetris Blocks has been featured in Salon, Paper Magazine, and Men's Health!

  • MOBSTERS HONOR by YVONNE CROWE

    0 out of 5

    Jovan Vukasin (Jован Вукашин), is the Boss of a Serbian Gang in London, with a James Bond complex.

    Why has his street cred plummeted to the level of radio active waste; and why has he set out on a series of blunders that can only spell disaster in the long run, putting his ultimate goal of emulating James Bond’s lifestyle on the Riviera in jeopardy?

    After settling on a daring raid, targeting the Ukrainian London gang Pakhan’s cache of diamonds, which are expected to arrive in Tel Aviv, he sends out his troops to relieve the opposition of their gemstones, which results in hilarious consequences.

    What honor amongst thieves?

    How does Danylko, the Ukrainian pakhan, react to this?

    The story rockets through Tel Aviv, Bulgaria, Serbia and Africa, with a fast turnover of candidates for the top job, before returning to London, where chaos reigns supreme with no firm guiding hand directing the business.

    How can Scotland Yard keep the ultimate gangland war from erupting in London?

    All of this leaves God convulsed with mirth, at the futile attempts of mankind to usurp Himself in the scheme of things.

  • Intermezzo – Three Lusty Stories by Ida Tornovski

    0 out of 5

    Ida Tornovski’s short story collection is told with dry wit and humor, sprinkled with a generous dose of skepticism about that romantic notion called Love. The three satires—Interludes, Intermezzo, and Intercourse—are sophisticated sexy stories about Life, Lust and Love.

    Interludes are dating spoofs of one woman’s trysts and tribulations with would-be and has-been lovers whose actions and reactions are lacking a certain truthfulness and romance.

    Intermezzo takes place in 1965 the spy-laced Vienna of the Cold War era. Three sexy adults role-play with humorous romance turning into fantasy, jealousy and betrayal. They call it Love. As the action takes place in a hotel across from the Vienna Opera house, the conclusion of this parody is reinforced by the last words of Leoncavallo’s ‘Pagliacci’.

    Intercourse explores dictionary definitions of the very word that evokes such titillating imagery. A girl with the unfortunate name of Fata Morgana morphs from a shy and pimply cygnet into a nubile swan. This is achieved only via teenage angst and the learning curve from three other young women. While their fancy Swiss academy is an all-girl school there is Paolo, the young Italian gardener.

  • GOOD QUEEN BETH by Alan Hardy

    0 out of 5

    The country is in the grip of a cruel, Dracula-like King, his ugly, fat Queen and half-witted, degenerate sons. The ordinary people find solace in binge-drinking, vandalising the streets, and salivating over scantily-dressed bimbo celebrities. The country is going to the dogs. Who can save it from collapse into anarchy? Is it the drug-fuelled, sex-mad, perpetually half-naked Mandy? Is it the cross-dressing, messed-up Jason, with his strange little black moustache, and hatred for everybody? Or is it the people’s whore, Beth..? Will she be able to bewitch a whole country with her beautiful, mesmeric, blue eyes..? Be warned: Revolution requires blood, murder, mania, lust, depravity, perversion, and even more blood…before the nation can be cleansed…and then will demand even more…and more and more…until…

  • GABRIELLA by ALAN HARDY @AlanWilliamHard

    0 out of 5

    The novel deals with the theme of a young man’s sexual awakening. The male hero is Jim Collier, sixteen, shy and virginal. The female hero is Gabriella Blenkinsop, eighteen, experienced, beautiful.

    The setting is the annual cricket match between St Swithins Boys School and the local grammar school shits. Gabriella is the Head Girl of St Swithins Girls School; her boyfriend is Algy, Head Boy of the Boys’ School. Jim is one of the opening bowlers for the grammar school shits.

    Gabriella is an arrogant, upper-class bit of hot totty. She wants to see the lower-class grammar school shits taught their customary annual lesson. St Swithins have merely to knock off eighty-odd runs to win the match. It should be easy.

    Gabriella is discomfited by young Jim; usually so cool and self-confident, she feels and becomes clumsy and awkward before him. She is determined to see him, and his whole race and class, humiliated.

    Jim has developed two particular types of delivery in his fast bowling; he bowls like a devil and begins working his way through the line-up of upper-class wallies, to the fury of Gabriella.

    We also meet Jim’s parents, his dad obsessed with football and his mum forever reading celebrity magazines, and Gabriella’s parents, two upper-class decadents making their ravenous way through the supply of working-class sexual fodder rounded up for them by their man, Chivers.

    Gabriella gets her daddy to change the rules so that she can go in to bat and save St Swithins from the vicious succession of balls sent down by the low-born shit. She gets padded up in all her physical glory.

    There then follows the contest between Gabriella and Jim, he, with a mixture of different balls and probing deliveries, attempting to break through her defences and she, determined and rock-like, trying to block him out. The game of cricket, the hard red ball, the long-handled bat, and so on, becomes the arena for the sexual tussle between the two principal characters. It becomes an extended metaphor for the game of love, and all its intricacies, and also for the sexual act, from foreplay to actual fulfilment. It is also the arena for the growing realisation on the parts of both Gabriella and Jim that they are madly in love with each other; their hate for each other, whether class-based or personal, is an expression not just of the sexual tension between them, but also, eventually, of their love for each other.

    We meet other characters throughout the afternoon and evening, amongst others, the third-former Mary Collier, Jim’s sister, who has a crush on Gabriella, and whom Gabriella later realises is the child of her own father, Lord Blenkinsop, and therefore her own half-sister, and Fanny, a former acquaintance of Jim’s, who becomes a rival for Jim’s affections just when Gabriella thinks she has ensnared him. At the same stage, when Jim has to decide which girl he wants, the truth concerning Gabriella’s parentage is revealed to us (Chivers is her father), and helps Jim in his choice.

    Their sexual sparring, on and off the pitch, entails various activities with ball and bat. Jim writes poems about Gabriella in between overs, Gabriella taunts him with her provocative dress and behaviour, and strange things occur with the hard red ball which, at times, smashes into Gabriella’s body or gets rubbed frenetically near Jim’s cock. Jim hits her with such a succession of venomous rearing balls that she is slowly divested of articles of clothing, and their love-hate affair culminates in a final over of frenzied bowling and batting which mirrors the sexual act of penetration and annihilation itself.

    This is a sexual comedy, where the game of cricket, and who will be the winner or loser, is used as an image of love-making, romantic attachment and sexual intercourse. It is, ultimately, a love-story between two characters from opposite ends of the social stratum, a young innocent man’s first experience of sex and a young very experienced woman’s first experience of love. The ending is happy (or so, at least, it seems).